Thoughts on a tragedy...

As you may know, I am a young United Methodist student pastor.  Writing a sermon after the tragedy in Connecticut was very difficult.  It was made more difficult by the fact that it was right before the third Sunday of Advent when we are supposed to be lighting the third candle for joy.  Somehow we had to have joy after a horrible tragedy.  I am writing this blog post knowing that 9/10 of pastors out there have already written a post about this and probably more eloquently than I can.  At the same time, I hear enough bad theology mixed with the good, that perhaps we need to all be writing.  So, this blog post is based upon the sermon I preached last Sunday about two Scripture passages all about joy, Isaiah 12:2-6 and Philippians 4:4-7.

Philippians 4:4 said, “Rejoice in the Lord always.  I will say I again: Rejoice!” (NIV) How can we ever have joy in the midst of such a tragedy?  How can we trust and not be afraid? How do we have joy when all we want to do is cry?  These were children!  Yet, somehow, we are called to have joy even when there is evil in the world, to rejoice because the Lord is near, to rejoice because Jesus is coming soon.  Christmas is near!

So, what is joy?  How can we have it this week or after any tragedy that shakes our world?  One option is what has come to be known as the Pollyanna kind of joy. In that sweet story, a little orphan girl goes to live with her childless and unmarried aunt who has no idea how to treat a child.  Pollyanna, when faced with adversity big or small, only focuses on the good.  There is no room for tears.

Is that joy?  It is certainly what many Christians seem to think joy is.  Pollyanna’s theory is that you ignore the bad and find the good.  There is no room for grief or crying and it is only right to smile and be “glad.”  This theory falls apart quickly in light of shootings like the one on Friday.  I don’t think that the “glad game” is joy.

I also don’t think joy is an emotion at all.  When we talk about an emotion, we talk about being happy or glad.  No person can be happy all the time.  This is an emotional high.  Happiness is temporary, fleeting.  Happiness is a good thing, but it is no joy. 

True joy, though, is born of knowing that Jesus Christ has come, has died for us, has risen from the dead and will come again.  That joy is here no matter what happens, if we have faith.  That joy is here in the horrors and evils of life.  We can have this joy as we cry for those who were brutally killed.  We can have this joy as we deal with our own losses in life.

Paul in Philippians is writing from a jail cell, Isaiah is writing a hymn to be used when the Israelites are restored.  In the midst of some very bad things, these authors are calling for joy.  And what can be worse than horrible tragedies like the one on Friday?  Where is the joy for the families of those who died?  For the parents and families of the 28 people who died in Newtown on Friday.  Where is the joy for those families?  Where is the joy for those of us sitting here anywhere else in the United States knowing that this can happen in our country?  Knowing that in China 22 children were stabbed with a knife on the same day?

Joy is not the opposite of pain.  Joy is not the opposite of grieving or horror or evil in this world.  Joy is the only thing that gets us through that pain and that horror.  Joy in the knowledge that Jesus Christ came at Christmas, died at Good Friday, rose at Easter, and will come again one day. 

Joy is not denying or ignoring evil, like the Pollyanna glad game.  Joy is not forsaking all feeling at all.  Joy, instead, is what as we weep allows us to heal.  Joy, that assurance that God is with us and that Christ is alive, is what allows us to move forward after these great tragedies.  Joy is the hope in Christ, the peace that can only come from Christ.  I saw a picture on Facebook the other day.  It had Jesus hugging a child.  Jesus is down at the child’s level with the child’s head on his shoulder as Jesus’ eyes are closed.  That comfort, I believe, is joy.

Never say that events like these are God’s plan.  God does NOT plan evil, God does NOT cause evil to happen.  A good God cannot cause evil, and there is nothing else to call these events but evil.  What God does do is call us to have joy in the understanding that God is our salvation.  We can trust and not be afraid.  We can call on God’s name.  We can rejoice in the Lord always, because we know that God is good all the time and that God is with us, was with those who died, is with those families, and is with all the survivors.

            This may not be a lot of comfort to those families or that community right now, but if those of us who are watching and praying can have this joy, we can be here for them as a witness until they are ready.  We can stand next to them telling them that God DOES love them, no matter what they may hear from certain religious groups.  So, perhaps, it is our job now to be that witness.

Amen.

Day 10 Follow

For some time on Friday, I feared that this blog would be uneventful and boring. The morning began with the announcement that we would be discussing budget in the morning, followed by as many petitions as possible in the afternoon. The schedule even said that we would not be meeting in the evening unless necessary. The end of the day was to be the closing worship. We all expected to be sticking around late into the evening, but knew that we must be out of the Convention Center by midnight.

In the morning, the main discussion was surrounding the budget. For the first time, our budget has actually gone down from previous quadrennium. It some time before enough people were satisfied, but it eventually was passed. Some of the other legislation that passed was one requiring petitions to come from some group, not crazy individuals. This is because nearly a hundred petitions were from just two people, and it is a waste of time and money. The idea is that if you cannot at least get a charge conference to support the petition, then it probably does not need to be sent. Also in the morning, the elimination of guaranteed appointments was referred to the Judicial Council to evaluate its constitutionality.

I was rather tired on Friday, and I assumed that I would be put in during the evening to vote, since nobody would want to stay around for a few boring leftover petitions. To alleviate some of this exhaustion, several times during the morning and afternoon, I went for short walks. This was a very bad idea, since I missed two significant things.

In the morning, the young delegates claimed a point of personal privilege. In this, they (and I say “they” because I chose not to be a part of its drafting) speak about the good that the church has done but turn quickly toward the way that the church has wronged young people. To see the short video, go to http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=788940844630 As I said, I happened to chose exactly the wrong moment to run to the bank machine and get cash. I was gone for less than ten minutes and missed it. When I asked around me about how it went, the reaction was unfortunately not complimentary. I was told that people’s eyes glazed over, because it was just one more time that the older generation is being browbeaten regarding how bad and oppressive it is to young voices. In reality, during this General Conference, young people have spoken several times about how oppressed it is, and it is starting to backfire with some people. It worries me that this is the case, since it is a legitimate concern to want to be heard, but it is too easy to go too far.

During the final Communion service at lunch time of General Conference, I was reminded again of how wonderful the word Alleluia can be. We come speaking different languages from different cultures, but every person there can sing the word Alleluia. For that matter, we come with different musical abilities and abilities to sing. Yesterday’s Communion service was written by an ex-convict for prison ministry. Since illiteracy is high in prisons, having a bulletin is not a helpful way to have a participatory service. One way they help this is by having a person who can read do the reading of the congregation’s responses, which the congregation then repeats. Anther practice we learned was a way of singing Alleluia. The pianist played a few soft chords as background and we were all to sing the word Alleluia with our own tune, at our own pace, and in our own way. Eventually, the leader would lead us into the song Halle Halle Halle-lu-ujah. We started Halle Halle slowly and gently from the tuneless worship of our Alluias and it gradually moved to the point were we were clapping, singly loudly and quickly, enjoying the time of worship of our God. It was a powerful moment and a practice for worship that I hope to remember and use someday.

In the afternoon, I took another walk that had unfortunate timing. I answered the phone when my mom called, and around perhaps 4:35 or 4:40, I looked up to see that people were leaving the room. I assumed that for some reason they decided to end early, so I headed back inside to see what caused this early dinner break. Then, I was told. Plan UMC, which was the compromise for the restructuring, had been declared unconstitutional by the Judicial Council. Delegates were milling around in shock. A ten minute recess had been called to allow delegates to function after the shock of the news. This meant that all the work done based on the assumption that Plan UMC, rather than the 2008 structure, would be in place, was just gone. That is the budget, several petitions, and elections. There would now have to be new elections, a decision about possible future restructuring, and budget considerations. The agencies and boards still needed to reduce in size, so dead petitions were revitalized. By 4:50, nobody was ready to come back to work, so the dinner recess was called.

Not everybody in the room was devastated, though most were. Many spoke about how this was a waste of two weeks and 8 million dollars. Others reminded them that other work did get done, and perhaps this will lay the foundation for restructuring in 2016. Many spoke about the huge amount of work that would have to be done in the evening before midnight. It was a daunting thought. Some took a more optimistic approach, though they were still very disappointed. One pastor said, “Jesus is still Lord and the churches will still open on Sunday.” Others tweeted that they would still be serving Communion this Sunday. In some ways, these acted as a reality check for people. A final group, those against aspects of the restructuring, celebrated. Some were dancing when the announcement was made. Another came to the microphone during the evening session and asked if people did not feel the Holy Spirit arriving in the room when the announcement was made.

The restructuring was declared unconstitutional and unsalvageable by the Judicial Council. It delegated some of the authority of the General Conference to a small group. What upset people the most about this ruling was that the parts declared unconstitutional were from the Call to Action proposals. Many wondered how it ever got this far. In the end, though, all the necessary work for the denomination to function over the next 4 years was completed. It might not be ideal, but it will work. In the end, no church is closing its doors tomorrow because of this decision. Over all, Jesus is Lord and we will survive or not as a denomination…but we will worship our risen savior either way.

We ended the day with a short worship service, a sermon by Bishop Wenner, and a walk back to the hotel at 11 PM. By midnight I was asleep, at 2:45 I was up again, and by 3:30 I was checked in to the airport. I returned to Columbus by 9 and was back asleep by 10. Yay nap! I will write at least one more blog post reflecting on some of the things that did not make it into the blog because of space. Just stick with me for one more day!

Day 9 Feed

This blog tonight is a hard one for me to write, because this was a very long day that in many ways revolved around a very sensitive issue, human sexuality, specifically homosexuality. Though it only officially spent a couple hours on the floor of the conference, the topic has pervaded the entire atmosphere of the day.

This morning did not start with a discussion of homosexuality. In fact, it began with a fairly widely supported petition sent from the Global Young People's Convocation and Legislative Assembly in Berlin almost two years ago. I was there! This petition, which I believe I spoke about in a previous blog, is a non-disciplinary petition that urges committees, boards, and agencies to consider the schedules of young people when setting meetings. For instance, setting ameeting in the middle of a weekday is not conducive to participation by young people. The petition was amended by the young people of this conference to make the language stronger. It did pass, though there was some concern by international delegates that the school schedules in their countries are not the same as the ones here. It was important to them that preferential treatment not be given to young people in the US.

The next proposal was the beginning of the homosexuality/human sexuality debate. The discussion began at shortly before 9 AM surrounding a petition sent by the young people in Berlin. A substitution to this petition was proposed by some of the pastors of the largest UM churches in the US. Both petitions, in different lanuguage, basically stated two things. 1) We acknowledge that we disagree on the difficult issue of homosexuality. 2) We agree to disagree because at this time we cannot come to an agreement. This would mean that we can follow either path without repurcussions. The body chose to work on the original proposal, not the substitution.

There were several highlights to both sides of the debate that I will share with you. Most are paraphrases or summaries.
-This is silly because we disagree on almost everything, so why should this issue be treated differently.
-We have already passed a petition acknowledging we do not agree entirely on everything, and it is placed at the beginning of the social principles.
-There is too much pain caused by these words/statements/stances.
-It is important to speak the truth about all sin, not just this one, and our congregations understand this. They respect us when we speak truth about their sin.
-This is causing people to leave our church, because it is hateful language.
-Speaking truth, even in this, will call people to join the church, because they respect that. People do join the conservative churches.
-Many compare it to the act of reconcilliation and to our new full communion with traditionally African American denominations that left over racism.
-God would not create people in this way, and no more would God make a person to live with animals than he would create a person as homosexual...after this speech, the bishop reminded people to have a calm voice, not speak with inflamatory language, and not to call names...during the speech, somebody started to blow a whistle. The whistle was blown later also.
-Love and condoning actions of sin are not the same thing.
-We are all sinners, so why should this be treated differently?

As you can see, there were many passionate pleas on both sides. Some were appropriate and some were not. Many people sited statistics of growing churches, both conservative and liberal. Many people quoted the Bible.

From the beginning of the day, several people surrounded the bar of the conference and held out their hands, praying for the delegates. A man on the floor asked if our rules allow people to vote from any place in the bar. The bishop and secretary responded in the affirmative, and the man invited others to join him in standing by the curtains that are the bar of the conference, in order to stand with the demonstrators. As he said this, because he was out of order, the bishop spoke over him to cut him off. Some did move to those positions carrying their voting pads. A delegate asked if they could be asked to return to their seats, and the bishop ruled that they can vote from anywhere within the bar. Over time, many from the audience joined those praying at the curtain that represents the bar of the conference.

The petition, as many of you have heard, was defeated. As the recess was called immediately following the defeat, people flooded into the bar of the conference. The sang songs and gathered in the center. The celebrated Communion together. As the recess wound down, some even walked around and offered Communion to those who chose not to join them in the middle.

When the recess ended, the demonstrators chose to remain within the bar of the conference. Bishop Mike, the Indiana bishop, was presiding bishop at this time. He asked the "visitors" to leave the bar of the conference so we can conduct business. They chose to remain and they chose to sing over his speaking. He then explained that he would like to begin by using a song that his mother loved as the prayer. He asked that everybody respect the memory of his mother and listen quietly. As he read, "Surely the Presence of the Lord is in this place," the demonstrators chose to continue singing. He asked them again to leave or return to their seats (depending on if they are delegates or visitors). They chose to remain and continue singing. A speaker from Church and Society (if I remember correctly) asked everybody to take a white piece of paper. She asked us to wave them if we are loved by God, then if we are under 25, then if we are not white, then if we are not in a congregation that is primarily our race, then if we have children or grandchildren in their teens, then she explained that she has family or friends who are GBLT. While she spoke, the protesters continued to sing, though they did become somewhat quieter so she could be heard. After she finished, Bishop Mike asked again for them to leave or return to their seats. He explained that if they do not comply, then he will be forced to call the lunch recess and ask that only delegates be allowed back in after lunch. After perhaps 5-8 chances, Bishop Mike asked them one more time to leave or sit, and he ruled that we were in recess. He also ruled that only delegates will be allowed in the room after lunch. In the end, the protest cost about an hour and a half of discussion time that was to be devoted to homosexuality.

During lunch, the news eventually spread that the bishops decided that they would allow visitors in the room after lunch. Apparently, the protesters were told that they can either leave so business can continue or they can be arrested. Twitter stated that they chose to be arrested. Then, the bishops spent much time talking with them, trying to convince them to not let it go that far. I do not know what was said to them or what they said. I do know that when we returned from lunch a few things happened. 1) They were still in the center of the conference bar when I arrived. 2) The bishops made a statement acknowledging the hurting and pain. Prayer was said, and scripture was read. 3) They then filed out of the bar of the conference peacefully, quietly, and apparently willingly.

Even though, because of the scheduled calendar items we did not discuss homosexuality again in the legislative sessions, it still was a part of the entire day's proceedings. During the lunch break, as usual, I went to the Communion service. During a time of silent prayer, a person spokeabout how painful it is when the Communion service does not acknowledge what has just happened. She said that it was not acknowledged in the Communion service over the last few General Conferences either. In the evening, during the end of day worship, the bishop clearly spoke about the pain in her sermon. She said that something is wrong when certain people are not welcome to our table. Before the service begain, the worship leader explained that we are having a love feast because we need to come together in love, even though many have trouble seeing good or love right now in light of the denomination's decision.

There were a lot of strong feelings, harsh words, and feelings of hurt in the Conference center today, with people on both sides of the issue. We are divided as individuals in the United Methodist Church on this issue, and some of our bishops clearly end up on one side or the other. Today, the denomination has chosen to affirm the current stance. It is unlikely in my opinion, though I suppose it is possible, that this will come up again tomorrow. If it does, I expect we will again see protests. I know that the Westboro Baptist Church is planning to pay us a visit.

While this is perhaps a depressing note, I am going to end here, because adding more would seem inappropriate. I do want to affirm however, as was affirmed earlier today in worship, that God is good all the time!

Day 8 Encounter

My morning began, as usual, with listening to speakers to seminary students. This morning, our speakers were a bishop speaking about the world wide nature of the church and a woman from Methodist Federeation for Social Action (MFSA). We have heard over the last few weeks from Good News, MFSA, Reconciling Ministries, several bishops, restructuring, global nature of the church, and the running of General Conference. When the bishop spoke, he explained a few points that I never before understood. He explained the concept of the Global Book of Discipline. In this proposal, we would have one Book of Discipline in most of it, but some can be changed to fit the context of each Central Conference. For some time, I have feared this, because I worried that it would be too easy to argue what parts are contextual. The proposal, however, states that the only part that may be changed is Part V of the Discipline. This section deals with the Administration of the church. The earlier four sections include our Constitution, Doctrines and theology, and the Social Principles. At this announcement, I had a question (since I did not know this part of our polity). I asked him, "What happens if a Central Conference adopts something in Part V that is in conflict with something in Part I-IV?" He explained that at that point it would be referred to the Judicial Council who would rule whether or not the petition can be accepted. I suppose this is something I would have learned in UM Polity class next January?

After we were done hearing from speakers, I headed up to the plenary, and I discovered one of the main duties of a reserve delegate...one who runs errands! I was asked to head down the street to the supermarket to buy a wedding card and reeses cups for a member of our delegation. This delegate is getting married 6 days after she gets home from General Conference! In this case, I had no problem acting as errand runner! I was gone for perhaps half an hour, and I returned in plenty of time to hear the more controversial debate.

The main petition discussed this morning was regarding the restructuring of the UMC. The plan that was set forth is not any of the original petitions. It was intended to be a compromise and is simply referred to as Plan UMC or The Plan. Plan UMC was printed in yesterday's DCA (Daily Christian Advocate). It is important to note the background of this plan. Last week, in legislative committee, no plan for restructuring was passed to the full General Conference. On Monday, permission was given for a small group of people to work on a compromise of the plans and for it to be printed in the DCA. To read the full plan (all 70 some pages of it), go to planumc.org. Otherwise, google it to find a summary.

During the debate, we understandably had people on all sides. Those who were against the petition explained that it was not given with enough time to fully understand the petition, especially since the only way to get it in any language except English was in Google Translate. They also explained that it was developed behind closed doors by a few people,,, and this made them uncomfortable. GCORR and GCSRW, the general commissions that deal with issues of race and women, respectively, were unhappy with the plan because it combined the two. There was even a motion made to change that. Central Conference delegates also feared the lower numbers of representation, and they made a motion to change that. This motion was passed, and the numbers were increased to accomodate their motion. In the end, right before lunch, Plan UMC was approved as the plan for restructuring in our denomination. Boy am I glad I have not yet taken Polity! It passed by 59%, and one person rose after lunch to ask that it go before the Judicial Council to be sure that nothing in the Plan requires a constitutional amendment. If it does, it would actually require a 2/3 vote. Polity at work right in front of my eyes!

During lunch, I was informed that I would be able to sit for one of our delegates, in order to give me the opportunity to experience voting. It was particularly interesting because this afternoon, we were scheduled to discuss divestment from Caterpillar, Hewlett Packard, and Motorola because they supply Israel with items that Israel proceeds to use in a way that many disapprove of. So, excited, I went to sit behind the bar to vote for the very first time. In fact, my first vote was about whether or not we should send Plan UMC to the Judicial Council. After a few fairly routine votes, we moved to Israel and Palestine. First, we voted on a petition that revised the Book of Resolutions regarding the situation between the two countries. This did pass.

Second, we voted on the petition regarding divestment. The original petition called for divestment and named the companies. In committee, it was amended to remove that language, to call for peace in Israel and Palestine, and to call for additional standards for any company in which we invest. A minority report was proposed which presented the original language. In a case like this, we first vote on which petition from which we will work. By a large margin, the conference decided to spend time on the majority report without the language of divestment. The first motion, then, was to amend the petition to include language of divestment. It failed. The second motion added language condemning Israel for its actions with aettlements along the wall. It failed. In the end, the petition passed as amended by the committee. Some of the highlights of the debate included 1) a woman compared Israel to Nazi Germany, 2) a man explained that modern Israel and Judaism are not synonymous, 3) people testified to the pain they have seen that is inflicted by Israel, 4) people spoke of pleas by Palestinian Christians and some Jewish groups for divestment, 5) others highlighted Jewish groups against divestment, 6) some explained that the situation is far too complicated to assign total blame, 7) some explained that punishing Cat for how Israel uses its bulldozers to punishing a car dealer for a teen getting in a car, 8) one pointed out that it is a bad idea to mandate investments and not just let the General Board of Pensions and Health Benefits do their job, 9) yet another explained that this was hypocritical and young people leave the church because it is hypocritical, and many more pleas on both sides were given.

It is interesting to sit on the floor, because you can see things that are not visible from the stands. For instance, most people, from all countries, spend most of their time on their phones, texting, on twitter, or on facebook. The delegates tend to make comments back and forth between each other just as we do in the stands, and many are sarcastic. You are less likely to get called on if you sit in the back of the room. It is impossible to tell from where each person is speaking unless you happen to know where that microphone is. Finally, voting electronically is a bit anticlimactic after seeing the many issues people had on the first day. For the most part, we simply needed to push 1 for yes and 2 for no. There were times of confusion when it was not a yes/no question, though. A benefit to sitting on the floor is that my District Superintendent bought snacks for the entire table and shared them around. I love my DS!

At the end of the plenary, just at the beginning of the prayer that was to preceed the announcement of a recess and after the announcement that divestment had not passed, there was a loud protest. Probably at least a hundred people marched into the bar of the conference, down the center aisle, singing and chanting. For some time, I could not understand what they were saying. As they made all this noise, the bishop continued to pray, he just got louder. He included the protesters in his prayer, praying over them because there are people who are hurting. As he called the recess, I and most others, went ahead and left, since it was dinner time, so I do not know how the protest ended. At first I was confused. I was not positive what the protest was actually about. They were mostly wearing rainbow items, but the timing was immediately after divestment was voted down. I assumed that many of them could stand for both issues. In the end, we concluded that they were protesting in favor of homosexuality, since they were apparently yelling that movement's slogans. Many (from the very liberal to the conservative) were upset because they interrupted a prayer. Others pointed out later on the floor that this was a violation of the rules of the Annual Conference. The presiding bishop that evening ruled that the earlier bishop had already called the recess. Many chose to stand and join the protesters. Many others simply made no stand to support or reject. Tomorrow we will be discussing homosexuality for most of the day, and we can undoubtedly expect more protests and demonstrations as the delegates discuss, debate, and pray. Tomorrow will be a very emotional day for many.

This evening, the worship service was a memorial service for all the bishops who died in the last quadrennium. It was an absolutely beautiful service. During the sermon, the bishop preaching gave an illustration that I hope never to forget. She explained that death is like a ship going off into the horizon. As it goes out of sight, the observers say, "there it goes." At the same time there are others waatching from the other direction saying, "here it comes!" As they do in many services like this, each person who passed away was named. As they were named, people stood to honor them if this bishop touched their lives. Bishop Sheldon Deuker was named tonight, and ene though I never knew him, I stood. I stood because he came from Indiana, but more, I stood because he spent time at Grace. I stood knowing that there were people at my home church, Grace UMC, who would have stood for him and did not get a chance tonight. I chose to stand on behalf of my church, in his memory knowing he would have affected the identity of the church that shaped me. In a way, I guess he did touch my life.

God bless and good night.

Day 7 Encourage

What a day. The first thing to happen this morning was the voting on the consent calendar. When they vote on consent calendar, the first thing that happens is that certain pieces are announced that were pulled the previous day. Two pieces of legislation that were supposed to be pulled could not be pulled because of an invalid signature on each. The delegates voted to pass the consent calendars. At that moment I realized something that made me very unhappy. Guaranteed appointments had been voted away with no discussion or acknowledgment. The business of the day continued like any other day. Meanwhile, social media exploded with discussion of this new development in clergy jobs. After a couple of hours, a man rose to ask a question. "Did we pass the end of guaranteed appointments in the consent calendar? I know it was my own fault for not realizing this sooner." The presiding bishop answered in the affirmative, and suddenly people all over the room started to mutter to one another. The delegate then moved that they reconsider this petition, because he believed it deserved discussion. Several people then rose to speak to this motion. The first to speak for it explained that, even though she would NEVER be on twitter or facebook during legislative sessions, she was aware that people are appalled it was passed with no discussion. All those who spoke against the motion, actually spoke against guaranteed appointments. In the end, the motion to reconsider was voted down by 30 some percent yes to 60 some percent no.

I was not happy with this development, both because it meant no discussion and because it ended guaranteed appointments. Based on my posts on twitter and the conversations I had around me, here were a few of the things said, on both sides, after the results. "Nobody else has guaranteed jobs." "Other jobs do require you to be able to move at a moments notice." "It is way too hard to deal with clergy ineffectiveness because there is often not hard and fast evidence." "The amendments made in committee put more checks on the system, so it is not too easy to just not appoint somebody." "It should not stifle our prophetic voice, because Jesus never promised us security in exchange for preaching prophetically." "It is an issue of trust." "Do we trust in the people or in the calling God has given us?" "We are worried about losing our jobs, but it is not like we are being jailed or killed for what we say."

Many of those were said to me in conversation, because I was obviously very unhappy. It was interesting though, because I had strangers ask me what I thought about this as soon as they found out I was in seminary. I also had strangers (who turned out to be District Superintendents), tell me that anybody with such a passion will have no problem. Another told me that this will help young clergy, because they can exit older ineffective pastors to give young new clergy a chance. One person walked up to me after the vote and said (half joking and half serious), "Are you still going to submit your commissioning paperwork?" I nodded. "Good, because I am also going to stick with it." After these many conversations, I am much calmer about the whole situation. Above all, I do trust the calling God has placed on my life. I also do trust our current leadership. For the most part, I trust our system. I guess we just have to see how it plays out.

In the midst of all this drama, a more lighthearted story took place. In the afternoon, I arrived at the legislative session to see one of our reserve delegates sitting with a huge cardboard box. It was almost cube shaped and was perhaps 18-20 inches in each direction. The reserve delegate says to me, "it is one of our delegate's birthday and this is a cake for him. Would you watch it because I have to go sit in for somebody to vote?" So here I am, sitting with a big cardboard box wondering why on earth there was a cake this big for just our delegation. As a few of us from Indiana who are not able to vote often sat and looked at this box, eventually our curiosity got the best of us. We opened the box to find...a small chocolate cake. It was the size of a normal round cake tin, not double layered, and it was sitting on a porcelin plate uncovered! The cake was beautiful with its decorations, but the size in that big box was a little anticlimactic. The porcelin plate was sitting slanted on a stack of plastic forks. As one of our reserve delegates said, only a man would put a cake like this in a cardboard box uncovered. It was sweating!

Eventually, the time came for the afternoon break. We carried it to a table just outside the bar of the conference brought over the delegation, and sang to him at the top of our lungs. Strangers started to join in and people from other parts of the room even clapped for him when we were done! Well, I assume they clapped for his birthday, since our singing was not particularly phenomenal. I was asked to cut and serve the cake. As I am getting to the end of our delegation, I notice that people from the Texas conference were hovering like flies over the cake. They were hoping for a piece :) Once every Indiana person had a piece, I was given permission to get rid of it in any way possible, so our scavenger friends from Texas were rewarded for hovering. The last piece was given to a random woman walking by. It is nice to make her smile, even though I was not the one to buy the cake. It is amazing how popular you become when you cut cake...

This afternoon, we were treated by a visit from an amazing lady. They explain that she was born in 1906, was married to a bishop, and has been at every single General Conference since a year in the 1930s. She was sitting in a wheelchair in front of the stage. As they focus the cameras on her, the General Conference gives her a standing ovation. Now, the General COnference seems to give a standing ovation for everything, but usually it takes a bit of time for everybody to stand. For her, everybody stood instantly. And then, this 106 year old woman stood to wave and greet us! She is 106 years old but does not look a day over 80! When she spoke to us and thanked us, she explained she was only having trouble because she had shingles. She didn't even sound a day over 80! As I posted about this on facebook, my Grandma asked if she might be Miss Louise. I had not idea since she was announced by her full name. Then Grandma mentioned her first and last name. This woman is a member of the church where my Grandparents are members and where my mother grew up! Isn't it amazing the connections that are made and the joy in the long life of a woman who still loves the Lord!

Several more petitions that passed today were significant. 1) The Congo received one more bishop. 2) Funds were given for Central Conference scholarships. 3) The preamble of the Social Principles were changed with some added language that acknowledges differences in opinion but and affirmation of Christ;'s love. And perhaps my favorite, 4) we are now in full communion with the pan-Methodist denominations. We are bridging some of the gaps created by racism in our church.

This evening, I am sorry to say, I cannot report on the final worship service or the presentation of visiting ecumenical leaders. Since I am missing two weeks of classes to be here, I had to take some time to actually do some homework reading! Oh the joys of being a student. Coming up this week though, restructuring, divestment, and homosexuality.

Good night!!

Day 6 Embark

The first day of full legislative plenaries started today! YAY!! I can hardly believe we are already half way through! This has been a fun time down here.

Today, as legislation began, we started the day with votes on the consent calendars. Each passed easily, though many did have pieces of legislation pulled from the consent calendar to the floor of General Conference. This went by easily, and was followed by elections to the Judicial Council and the University Senate. Then, complication began. Voting at General Conference is done electronically for most votes, including these elections. To vote for elections, there was a very specific process that must be followed. If you are to vote for two people, then you actually cast two ballots. You may not choose the same person both times, and you must vote both times. If either of these criteria are not met, then the ballot is declared invalid.

In order to teach people the voting system, they asked the delegates to vote for their favorite Apostle. Peter and John consistently ranked at the top, Yay Peter! However, there were many invalid ballots each time. Over and over, the instructions were explained and the test votes were taken. Eventually, people got so frustrated, that a woman rose to speak. She said, "I am a second grade teacher, and suppose we ask every person to vote 1 and then 2, and we can be sure that everybody can follow that instruction on their voting pads." There was widespread affirmation of this idea. The chair chose not to follow this advice and eventually chose to have everybody vote for Peter on one ballot and another Apostle for the other. We ended up with a 98.7% vote for Peter. Peter was successfully voted to the Judicial Council!! Of course, the vote was swayed by the chair... At this moment they decided to continue with the elections.

For those of us observing, this was not the most interesting thing to observe. At one point, early in the test process, the woman sitting next to me apparently was not paying attention. She leaned over toward me and said, "but how are we supposed to know who these people are?!" As I stared at her, a few of us said, "they are the Apostles!!" My did she look embarassed!!

As the elections for the Judicial Council and University Senate began, the drama was not yet over. For Judicial Council, 11 laity were up for election. Two people had to be elected, and both were elected easily. From the remaining 9, 6 people had to be elected. When 6 votes were taken in a row, all ended up at above 50%. The bishop acting as chair did not understand what how this could happen. As we looked at the numbers, several mathematicians stood to explain how this could happen mathematically. Trying to explain math to a bunch of clergy and professional laity seems to be akin to explaining computers to somebody in their upper 80s. Sometimes it works, some fall in love with it, but many others are overwhelmed. The bishop ruled that we would move on to the next election while they discussed the matter and made a ruling. Eventually, the statement by the mathematicians/math teachers was upheld.

The major debate that happened today was in regard to the bishops. There was a proposal that died in legislative committee but was brought to the floor. This petition was to limit the term limits of bishops. It would eliminate lifetime election to the episcopacy. Because this is a constitutional ammendment, it required a 2/3 vote to pass. Over the morning and early afternoon, many amendments were made to the petition to try to make the petition more palatable. Each would allow re-election of bishops, but they would have to be re-elected after serving a given amount of time. Each amendment was rejected. In the end, the entire petition was voted to about 50/50 yes/no. Yes was slightly more than 50%, so it did not pass because it was not a 2/3 vote.

Those in favor of the petition to implement term limits for bishops did so for several reasons. 1) They reason that it will increase bishop effectiveness if they have to be re-elected to continue. This causes and increase in accountability. 2) We are very focused on effectiveness right now and it is appropriate to do this for bishops at a time when we are considering removing guaranteed appointments for elders. Those against the petition responded to each of these points. If our bishops have to worry about re-election this will 1) stifle their prophetic voice and 2) require them to focus on re-election rather than the work of their episcopal area. It will also limit the work that they can do over time, because some work takes more than 8 years to get done. As I said, the latter voice prevailed and bishops do not have term limits and do not need to be re-elected.

Not only has this been an interesting and significant day for legislation, but it has also been a great day for connections. At lunch I was privileged to sit and chat with a pastor about the good and bad experiences I have had in my candidacy process, and I am grateful that I have had more good than bad. He and I chatted about sermons and the importance of keeping all sermon manuscripts. I was enjoyable just to sit and chat about something other than General Conference, but something that is still significantly important to both of us. I love meeting new people and networking across the connection!

This evening, they had a Higher Education reception, which includes free food lots of music from various educational institutions. Some of my favorites were Africa University's choir and a Mariachi band of high schoolers from El Paso. I enjoyed the dinner, but I have to say mingling was very difficult for me because I am an introvert, so I eventually escaped. As I escaped, I went to get a pop with the person who invited me to the USO gathering the other day. She saw my blog about USO, as she was reading various General Conference blogs, and recognized the story! More connections! She and I sat and talked about seminary, young people, ageism, and the UMO. She talked about how horrible it was to watch what I was going through and be unable to stop it, and she thanked me for being brave enough to tell the story. I gave her permission to share my story from my blog as she will, and she says that she will absolutely share it. Hopefully people will learn from it and it will make a difference! Its kind of cool that my blog is getting around.

After I finished speaking with her, I decided to head back down stairs to the Young Delegate lounge, to escape the crowds for a little while. As I walked past the Higher Education reception, I noticed the high school band from El Paso, and decided to stop and watch the dancing. As I stood, one of the boys came and took me by the hand and took me in to dance! I learned two things...1) it is really fun to dance with a random Mexican guy in the middle of the hall way and 2) I am really bad at following when I don't know the dance. I think all the connections with people today made my day! So now that worship is over (it was great, definitely watch it online for the music), I'm off to be an introvert and rest a bit. Good night all and God bless! More coming tomorrow!

Day 5 Believe

Day 5 Believe
Today was a fascinating but very very long day. Again, I started the day by going o the speakers for seminarians. Then, immediately at 8 AM, we broke into the legislative groups. I continued to observe Higher Education and Ministry. Today, they zipped through legislation as fast as possible, had a short lunch and dinner time, and still did not manage to get everything done before the 9:30 cut off time according to the rules of the General Conference. There really is not much to say about what happened today, except that there was a lot of it.

There were a few petitions that are very significant in my mind. 1) the legislative committee voted to not support the petition that would get rid of commissioning and move ordination to right after seminary. The reasons were a) the question about whether ordination makes an ontological change or not, b) it does not fix the issue of giving sacramental authority to non-elders, because local pastors still have sacramental authority, and c) young people and Board of Ordained Ministries were surveyed by several delegates, and there was no consensus in either demographic about the good or bad nature of this petition. The main reasons given for it are that a) we have not developed a theology for commissioning, and b) it would put us in line with other denominations, helping our ecumenical relations.

A second petition that is near and dear to me and my life is the addition of questions for the examination of an ordination candidate. The main addition is that the candidate for ordination must answer additional questions detailing their effectiveness in ministry. Originally, the petition called for an elimination of the theological examination of ordination candidate, because they are already examined theologically before commissioning. For example, next July, I will be given the paperwork to start answering theological questions in order for me to be commissioned upon graduation. Next February, I will have to be examined orally regarding those theological questions I answered. I will be examined by a few members of the Board of Ordained Ministry. If I pass, I will be commissioned in June 2013. As it currently stands, in 3 years I will then be brought back before the board to answer questions and about theology and practice of ministry. The original form of this petition would remove the theology questions, because I would have answered them three years previously. It would also add the questions about effectiveness in ministry. The petition as it currently stands added back in the theological questions, because people’s understanding of theology can change quite a lot in 3 years, especially in 3 years that are as formative as these.

The day ended with a post-legislative meeting by some of the young delegates of the conference. All young delegates were invited to come to discuss a proposed amendment to a certain petition. The petition is non-Disciplinary, which means it is not one that affects the Book of Discipline. Therefore, it is more of a strong recommendation than a requirement. This petition was sent by the Global Young People’s Convocation and Legislative Assembly in Berlin. I was there in Berlin and did vote for this petition. It calls for all boards, agencies, and committees to schedule their meetings at times that take into account the school and work schedules of young people, because young people are put on committees then unable to go because of the scheduling. I, for instance, am missing two weeks of classes to be at General Conference. I was lucky that this was a possibility. I have seen things that meet in the middle of the day on a weekday, which will exclude most young people, and most non-retired working middle and older adults. The petition as amended in our proposal will make the language stronger. I enjoy seeing a group of young people collaborating and also checking each other’s ideas. Sometimes we can be idealists, and by checking with each other, some of the ideas that would not be well accepted can be stopped. This was a beneficial process, and I look forward to seeing what happens.

Well, I am very tired, but tomorrow is Sunday! We get most of the day off, until evening. Monday morning, it is back to work again! Good night all!!

Listen

Every morning during this week of General Conference, we begin the day at the legislative committees. The day is to start with morning prayer, and a basic format is included in our conference programs. The leaders have flexibility in how they choose to use this liturgy, but for the most part, the committee I follow has been staying close to this liturgy. Today, it occurred to me as we listened to the reading of Scripture how well steeped in Scripture this General Conference is. For a person who attends every worship service in a day, they will hear the same passage in the morning during the prayer service, at lunch time during the Communion service, and in the evening during the large worship service. The effect is that each day is ideally effectively centered around one Scripture that is reinforced time and again.

This morning in the legislative committee, the subcommittees did not meet. Instead, each subcommittee reported on its actions during the previous day, debate took place, and petitions were accepted or rejected. Any that are rejected will not go to the full plenary session, unless somebody gets 20 signatures.

Among the hot button topics this morning were 1) a petition to allow homosexual marriages in UM churches and chapels and 2) a petition to remove Claremont from our list of approved seminaries. Both elicited quite a lot of debate.

Obviously homosexuality was quite the topic. Many of the commonly heard arguments were made, and some were made that were new to me. On the side that supports the petition, most were from the US. We heard from people who believe there will be no young people left in the church if this is not passed. Others appealed to their inability to care for homosexual couples in the same way as the heterosexual couples. On the side against the amendment, the most vocal voices were from Africa, though many also spoke from this country. The ones from Africa explained that if homosexuality was to be allowed, they have been told not to bother coming back to Africa. They also explained that in Africa polygamy is very much a part of the culture. It is accepted and considered good, often. However, the church does not accept it, even though it can cause pastoral care issues. Most people who spoke appealed to the Biblical passages also. Another person spoke about procreation.

During the homosexuality debate, both sides were prone to verbosity. A person would speak and make a point. The next person would stand and basically repeat what the first person said. The third person would stand and say "I would like to reiterate..." and would repeat what was just said. It almost seemed as if each side believed that having the last word, even if it was repeating what had been said at least 5 times, would result in a victory. It was rather exhausting.

In the petition to remove Claremont, a person rose to propose an amendment adding Iliff, Boston, and Gammon to that list. This is because all four added together produce 33 elders per year on average. That is less than 10 per school. He argued that this was a poor use of our funds. His motion was voted down. He then proposed an amendment where every seminary must use 33% of the money given to them by the UMC must be used for indigenous seminary training in Central Conferences. This was voted down because the President of one of the seminaries stood and said that they already give from their budget and this would be limiting.

A great joy of the day took place during the lunch time communion service. The communion service takes place outside on the riverfront. Apparently, as we were receiving communion, somebody had come up on her bike. She must have been invited to stay, because she celebrated Communion with us before biking away. I love that even in the midst of a conference where we assume the people around us are Christian, somebody was witnessing. She felt comfortable enough to join us, and that is wonderful.

In the afternoon, the legislative committee broke into subcommittees. Quite a lot of discussion happened in the one I observed regarding security of appointments. With amendments, the subcommittee did overwhelmingly move to adopt the petition to get rid of guaranteed appointments.

This evening was exciting for me, because I got to sit in the bar of the conference! As a fourth reserve, I was wondering if I would make it onto the floor. Tonight, I was able to go in! Granted, this was a plenary session with no voting. Instead it was a worship service centered around repentance for acts committed against indigenous peoples of this country. I must admit, I wondered the relevancy during most of the service for our delegates from outside the United States. Eventually, the idea was tied into acts of repentance for acts committed against all indigenous peoples around the world, but the majority of the service was regarding Native Americans. In the end, I was just thrilled to be on the floor. It was fun to be down there and see some things up close that I could no see from the observer section.

Well, I am getting very tired. Tomorrow is a full day of only legislative committees. It is also the last day of legislative groups. Any petition not acted on tomorrow will be dead.

Good night all!

Day 3 Heal

During the legislative groups today, we began with a short time of morning prayer. Then they had the delegates go around and introduce themselve and tell a joy. It was great to hear from people from all around the world in a variety of languages. People had many varieties of joys, but one in particular caught my attention. A man from Sierra Leon explained that his joy was particularly because some people in Indiana supported the ministry he does through Operation Classroom, chipping in to provide a vehicle. Isn't it great to see where mission from our conference makes a great difference to somebody!!

After introductions and a break, we broke into subcommittees. I chose to follow the subcommittee that is focusing on the Commission on Ministry report. Among some of the items in this report are 1) eliminating commissioning, moving ordination forward to immediately after seminary, and following ordination with a probabtionary period, 2) requiring a ministry orientation for all future pastors of all kinds at certification, and 3) a clear definition of our various types of pastors: elders, deacons, and local pastors.

The subcommittee began by breaking into even smaller groups. These were to discuss the legislation under the subcommittee and make recommendations for the subcommittee. The subcommittee will in turn make recomendations to the full legislative committee. The legislative committee will make recommendations next week to the entire general conference. They have 5 choices. 1) they can create a consent calendar, 2) they can recommend a yes (perhaps with amendments), 3) they can recommend a no, and 4) they can refer legislation to an agency or board. 5) There is also a way they can reject one in favor of another.

This afternoon, the sub-subcommittees reported to the subcommittee. One of the discussions particularly of interest to me is the one regarding commissioning and ordination. When one person asked the committee who prepared the report what would happen to an ordained person who decides not to continue to full membership, he explained that ordination is an act of the church and can be taken away. This is very interesting, because the Ordinal says that ordination is an act of the Holy Spirit and the church, and it cannot be taken away. Passing legislation allowing the removal of ordination would change our theology of ordination. This can be done at General Conference, but it is not a change that I am in favor of. I believe ordination is an act of God as well as the church, just as is stated in the Ordinal. I look forward to hearing the full discussion later!

At dinner time tonight, I went to dinner with many of the other seminarians here at General Conference. They only made reservations for 60, and we ran out of space! One of the people I ended up sitting with was a seminarian from Candler. He is a year older than me but a year behind me in school. Sometime during the meal, we got into a rather involved conversation regarding homosexuality, church splits, following ordination vows, and when to leave or not to leave. We actually landed on different sides of the issue. (and no I will not tell you where I am on the issue, make your own assumptions. Some of you reading this already know, but I do not want people to stop reading because they disagree with me) Even though we disagreed, we were able to have a respectful conversation that I believe is exactly what we mean by Christian Conferencing. We each heard the other out, acknowledged where the other was coming from, and recognized the difficulty or pain caused by each position. At one point we discussed how nasty people in the church can get in these disagreements when we forget that the person with whom we are speaking is a person. This moved to what we have heard about previous General Conferences and how often “holy conferencing” is not so holy. We talked all the way back to the convention center, when I realized that I left my phone at the restaurant and had to go back and get it. When I got back, I discovered it had been given to the professor who organized the dinner. So, I hiked back to the convention center (at least I walked off my pizza!). Eventually, I got my phone back, but by the time I got back into the plenary session, it was already 15 minutes in.

I ended up sitting right behind the professor who had had my phone and a young woman (another seminarian) who I have sat with multiple times. While the session was electing people to judicial council, I was mostly in conversation with the professor. She was inviting me to lunch tomorrow to hear a speaker she invited for her class about one of the pieces of legislation. As we were talking, and I was looking through my phone for messages, I noticed that something strange was going on. Where we had been listening to nominations for elections, there was suddenly somebody speaking very emotionally from one of the microphones on the floor. It took me a while to figure out what was going on, because I missed most of it because of distractions. Basically, what I finally figured out, was that in yesterday’s Holy Conferencing about homosexuality (which I skipped because I could not participate nor observe well), he had felt bullied because of his sexuality. He asked people to stand with him (in solidarity maybe? This was the moment when I started listening so I missed the reason.) Many people stood, and he continued to speak as the presiding bishop interrupted him and told him that this was out of order. The bishop explained that he had granted him a point of order and this was not a point of order. He also explained that there would be another time when it would be appropriate to discuss this issue. After a few seconds of the man continuing to talk and the bishop telling him to stop, the man asked for the bishop to at least say a prayer. The bishop agreed and prayed. The man sat down and the business continued followed by a worship service. After the service, many people went outside the conference and lined to doors and the paths to the stairs to stand for this man.

I would be interested to hear what was said and what actually happened. I almost wish that I had gone, in the off chance that I could have actually heard some of the discussion. People on both sides are often guilty of bullying, name calling, and hateful speech. It is sad that this is the case in the church. But it is true that it happens. I don't know what happened to him, what was said to him. Think what you will, I will not tell you what to think.

By the way, I'm famous! Read my last blog post at http://umonfire.blogspot.com. Well I guess I'm not exactly famous, but I was asked to share some of my blog with them.

Day 2 Invite!

Each day has a theme, and I will try to put that theme as the title of the day’s blog.

I began the day hearing speakers for seminary students, but the whole conference began the day with a short worship. The short worship was nice, but as it ended we sang "Christ the Lord is Risen Today." It occured to me that, even though I am not a huge fan of the timing of General Conference, it is great to meet during the season of Easter. I was then amused to hear the bishop who was speaking speak about the term Eastertide. I suppose we were supposed to have the reaction that I did when we sang "Christ the Lord is Risen today." Christ is Risen! He is Risen Indeed!

In the late afternoon I was bad and skipped the session, not wanting to hear more amendments to the rules. Honestly, it is not the most interesting part of conference. Instead I went to Cokesbury and went robe shopping for myself and my friends at seminary. Cheap robes are a blessing for those of us trying to build our pastoral collection. I did hear later that after two sessions of amendments, questions, and debates, the rules passed as they were originally proposed yesterday. Go figure.

During the lunch hour, about 20-30 of us gathered outside by the river to celebrate Communion together. Bishop Schnase officiated for us. It was a beautiful short service written by a woman who realized there was no communion service based on the theme of being at the lakeshore. It is also nice to take a break from a day of legislation and pointless amendments to remember why we are here. I will definitely be returning to the communion service tomorrow afternoon. I am a little surprised though that so few people showed up from the thousands of people in Tampa.

After lunch we gathered into legislative groups so that the elections may take place for the leadership within the group. I observed the session on Ministry and Higher Education. After several reminders by the bishop that we need to be inclusive, the votes took place. I tell you, these elections are almost as tedious as a session of the elections for general conference delegates! On the plus side, as we waited for each vote to be counted we sang old mostly well-known hymns and songs. It was a nice reminder that in the midst of the elections we are to remain in prayer.

After the legislative group session, the next thing on the agenda was Christian Conferencing. Since we had a few minutes to kill, I wandered down to the lounge set up for Young Delegates. Nobody else is allowed inside except by consensus of all those within the room. It is intended to be a safe space. So, I wandered in, had some conversation, and determined that it would probably not be worth much to go to the conversations, because I am not a delegate and it will likely be taking place in small groups. It is difficult to observe small groups from the back of the room. Then somebody came in and asked if we would allow them to bring others in and watch Glee (from last night). So I stuck around and watched Glee with a large group of young women (the young men laughed at us).

As dinner approached, I was invited to bring my dinner and eat with a particular organization. Because it doesn’t really matter what this organization was, I will refer to it as UMO. Realize that this organization could be yours. It could be UMW, UMM, UMYF, a group of Sunday School teachers, a particular United Methodist Church, a caucus group, or more. You may be able to figure out which group it is based on some of the things I say, but it doesn’t really matter. As you read my story insert whatever church group you belong to, especially if it has very few young people and wants them.

So, I was invited to dinner. I thought, “well, why not,” and I went to join them. The person speaking to them was the president of UMO. After she spoke, another woman spoke. This woman started to speak about how important it is that the young people stay involved in UMO. The sharks were circling. Then, looking straight at me (there were probably 8 people eating lunch down here and I was the only young stranger) she starts talking to me about how important it is to stay involved in UMO. Then the sharks started to bump up against me a bit. She asks me if I am involved in UMO. I say that I am not, and I explain that when I was at home, most UMO events met during the day on a weekday. In recent years, they have started to reach out to young people, but I am now in a different state at Seminary. In an effort to salvage myself a little, I explain that my sister and godson’s mom are both getting involved in UMO. Then, the sharks swam in and started to attack. “You know all pastors become members of UMO when they are ordained.” “You can have a group at seminary.” “It doesn’t take a formal group with a President to have a UMO group, you just need to do fellowship.” “You know, I have read so many books through our reading program that I never would have read before. It is so easy to use. Here is where it is in your church and how it works.” And on and on. They do a lot of great things, but very little is something I need or want at this point in my life. Finally, as I sit there wondering why on earth I would want to add a reading list of church books when I am already in school, I decide to voice this. I interrupt and explain that the books aren’t really interesting, since I am in school. Really, it is the mission aspects of UMO that are appealing. They then asked if I had ever attended their mission retreat, explained that often churches will help those who cannot pay for it to get the money, and that it has a ton of wonderful aspects. Finally, the conversation shifted away from me and we were told that UMO will meet to eat every lunch and dinner and have an evening prayer at the end of each day. I have not yet decided if I will go back. 1) It is rather scary to be attacked by sharks wanting my flesh…I mean wanting my participation in a group. It might be effective in driving me away. BUT 2) I have a strong urge to go back a few times so that I gain their trust enough to tell them how bad that introduction was. They had the best of intentions. They genuinely wanted me to get involved, get the connections and to benefit from what they have to offer. This inundating me with information and not listening to what I am interested in, however was not the way to do it. The scary part is that I have done this also. Honestly, if this is how we approach young people for organizations within the church, I worry about how we approach those outside the church. EEK!!

We should take this as a lesson! Listen before inundating with activities! This does not mean ignoring or not inviting them to something. It does mean slowing down, giving a couple ideas and asking if anything sounds interesting without pressure. I want to hear their stories! I want to know why this is important to them! I just don’t want to hear it all at once, and I want to hear why this should be important to me. A 24-year-old student who reads plenty of books and has plenty of friends for fellowship. Why should I join the UMO? For that matter, why should a 24-year-old grad student with plenty of friends who is already a member of a social club join a church? What do we have to offer? Why does this make a difference? Until we answer these questions AND act on them, not on what we think is interesting about the social opportunities, we cannot expect to see change.

Now let me be clear. I love the people in this organization and others. It is a great and important organization that does a lot of great work for our church. It was just a little frightening to experience exactly the same thing that is happening to every young person who walks in the doors of an older congregation.

This evening consisted of a plenary session with the Call to Action Report and a Finance report. Honestly, finances are boring. The Call to Action report is rather frightening regarding the future of the United States UMC, but I have read and heard all those facts and figures so many times, even given by one of the presenters, that none of it was truly new. We ended the day with an hour long worship that was rather amazing, and actually better than the opening worship of the General Conference.

In a paraphrase of tonight’s bishop who preached…Beautiful people, INVITE! Make disciples!

Good night!

General Conference Begins!!!

For the next several days, I will be posting daily discussing my experiences at General Conference as a reserve delegate. I am also a young person and a seminary student, so this will be quite an interesting ten days! For the next ten days, we will be discussing (or listening to the discussion) of the various proposals to the business of the church. The General Conference meets quarterly and is the only body that may speak for the United Methodist Church. The work of these days will revise the Book of Discipline and Book of Resolutions. Over the next several days, we will be discussing several hot button issues, which I will discuss here as they come up.

This has been quite an exciting day! It started with the briefing for young delegates. It was a lot of fun to both meet new people and to see all the people who I recognize either from Berlin, various committees, internships, and more. In small group discussions we were asked to think about two things. We were first asked to discuss where we have seen the UMC at its best. We discussed connectionalism, mission, world wide nature of the church, nurturing of calling and more. We were also asked to discuss where we would love to see the UMC in ten years if this General Conference went the best that it possibly could. People talked about inclusiveness, young people, and more. I explained that I would love the UMC to be a denomination that I do not have to worry about. That means, in part, that I can look over a meeting and see people under 50 and the majority under 60. That means, also, understanding our doctrine and standing for what we believe, rather than acting as if we believe nothing in particular. We have beliefs, but there is not always understanding of them.

Next, I went to hear about the opportunities for seminary students. I met students from Drew, Duke, Candler, and more. Many of them are here solely for a class. Most of them were shocked to hear that my school, the Methodist Theological School in Ohio, does not have a class, just individual study, and few of us came to Tampa. We learned that for the next two weeks, we will meet at 7 AM to hear from a large variety of speakers. We will hear from the exiting and entering President of the Council of Bishops. We will hear from all ends of the spectrum, from Good News to Reconciling Ministries. We will hear from many others, who I cannot remember. I think I will do my best to get up often and go to these talks. We were also invited to two dinners for seminary students over the course of conference. It is great to be making connections to other seminary students. This evening, we are at a legislative session. I was sitting near our delegation, but some of the Drew students walked by and invited me to join them. It is nice to make these connections.

After lunch and before dinner, we engaged in truly passionate worship. The opening service was a service of communion. I sat in midst of people who I did not know. As we sang Lord I Lift Your Name on High, I taught a lady the hand motions and we worshipped together. We heard a wonderful sermon about James and John leaving their nets to follow Jesus. One of my favorite parts of any global church experience is just that, we are a global church. We all prayed or sang, sometimes in one language and sometimes in our own languages. We heard readings and liturgy in a variety of languages, including sign language. Well, I guess we didn't hear the sign language! Liturgical dancing was a must in that worship service. Wonderful music, from new to old imbued the service. I did notice, though, during this service, I had no idea that we had so many bishops!

The last part of our day is the legislative session. In this session, the main goal is to adopt the rules for General Conference. The rules are being proposed in relatively small sections. At the moment we are on section 4, and only one section of the rules has been approved. All the rest had motions to amend, and based on the existing rules, any amendment on the rules must go to the committee. They must respond in less than 24 hours with a recommendation or report. Because so many sections have sparked motions, we are spending quite a lot of time in clarification, point of orders, and speeches. I must say, it is rather tedious to sit and listen to debates about a topic that is vitally important but very very boring. The only topic more boring is pensions!!

Signing off today, tune in tomorrow to hear about the first full day of legislation!

January 1: Drums, Dancing, and a Long night

Yesterday was a rich representation of Indian culture. Music played a large part of the day. Our first introduction was to an Indian drumline. Technically it was folk dancing and drumming, but when a bunch of men do fancy footwork in unison, shaking their hips, and beating at drums, it is clearly a drumline. They wore white tanks, white wrap pants, maroon strip of cloth around their waist, and an orange strip around their heads. They danced while beating flat drums that they strapped to one arm and cradled. One beat what looked like a bass drum, and another shook maracas. Then the cows and peacock arrived. Grown men in 2 elaborate cow costumes and one peacock shook their rear ends and flapped their wings. The entire thing was a lot of fun, especially when we joined in the dance. This folk dance has come to be used most often for funerals, but that is not their sole use.

Next we saw classical music and temple dance. Men and women played on a very large string instrument, a violin, and a couple drums. At one point, a woman sang. We also watched as a woman and two girl students did the temple dance. The girls were 8 and 10 or 11. They were dressed in very ornate and brightly colored outfits with jewelry even hanging below their noses. The teacher explained that the dances are used for worship, soothing, excitement, cooling, and even putting a child to bed. Every part of the dancer is part of the dance. The hands, arms, body position, facial expression, and even direction of the eyes are choreographed. These intricate, flowing, and beautiful dances could tell a story and left us in awe.

Yesterday evening at 9:45, we arrived at church. I still have absolutely no idea why we arrived then, because the New Year’s Eve service did not begin until 11:30. The service was entirely in Tamil, but it followed the basic familiar pattern. There were responsive readings, prayer, songs, sermon, baptism, and communion. Many of the songs were familiar tunes. Perhaps half of the hymns we recognized the tune and the other half were written locally. In another nod to the familiar, we were old later that the sermon was written to ask people to give money, though the theology was very prosperity gospel.

There were a few slight differences that I am SURE no American would mind. The length, for instance was jus a little long with the 3 HOUR SERVICE and 1 ½ HOUR SERMON. About the time there were 5 children screaming under the age of 3, I thought the sermon could do well to wrap up. Not to mention the two offerings and the split with men on the left side of the aisle and women on the right.

When it came time for communion, I was excited to be receiving it in India. To receive the elements, the men all go, followed by the women. They kneel at the rail and receive a wafer and a small cup of sickly sweet berry juice. We on the women’s side watched the men to see if we would be allowed to go forward (because of the possibility of unsafe water). The men in our group stood to go forward with the men of the church then ended up sitting back down because of a miscommunication. At that point I became very disappointed that we would be excluded because of bacteria. At the church women finished receiving the elements, our men stood back up and went forward. I was with a great sense of relief and joy that I went forward with the other women of the group to receive the elements. A comment made later by a member of the group was about a sermon they once heard. We can be afraid of the bacteria, perhaps, but these elements are blessed and at some point we must have faith. You know, here we must have faith in the physical safety of the elements, but isn’t communion a great act of faith anyway?

After the service, at about 2:30, our group was led outside where we were formally welcomed into the church. People took pictures of their children standing with us westerners. Music was played on a drum and a double-reed instrument that looked like a 3 foot oboe with holes instead of keys. We were led back inside the church and made to sit in the new rows facing the congregation. We were welcomed by name in the traditional Indian manner with very heavy necklaces made of flowers. At the end, we were each given small limes that we then handed to the pastor as we wished him a Happy New Year. It is a tradition at the New Year to greet a person in authority, like a pastor, with a lime. That pastor must have had close to 200 limes by 3:00 AM. What on earth do you do with all those limes? We should adopt this practice in the US except substitute chocolate ☺ (NOTE: We were told the next day that we were treated as a part of the church with the lime thing. If we were simply honored guests, we might have been given the limes. Instead we were given them to give to the pastor along with the congregation.)

We get back to TTS at 4 AM and had to be a breakfast by 9 to get on the bus to head into the mountains. Hopefully a few things will happen in the mountains at the fancy hotel…some rest, different food, and a hot shower.

December 31: CSI pastors!

Last night we were given the invaluable opportunity to sit and be in conversation with several Indian pastors from the Church of South India. CSI is a denomination formed from 7 denominations, including British Methodists but not United Methodists. We had ten pastors in he conversation, and the bishop came to greet us. The group of pastors and group of students were divided in half, and each group would sit in dialogue. That is 14 people in each circle. When my group of 9 students switched to the second set of 5 pastors, one of the pastors immediately started to speak with me. He was the only pastor who was retired, and I am the youngest looking of the students (though several of us are in our mid-twenties). I suspect me age is why he chose to speak to me. When we sat in the large group, he immediately introduced himself to me in particular. We were eventually given the chance to pair off and speak with the pastors. He quickly turned to me and we began to talk.

Joseph was his name and he related to me some fascinating things. He originally went to school to be a teacher, but his mentor wanted him to continue his studies and become a pastor so much hat he was given a scholarship. He then was sent by the diocese to study for a Masters of Secular Theology at Yale for a year in the 60s. After that year, he returned to India and was immediately appointed to a church. For the next 30 years, he was in ministry in a variety of churches and eventually as the Vice-chair, the pastor who is an assistant to the bishop. He says it is only by the will of God that he could have been given all those opportunities and become a pastor.

When I asked what his favorite part of ministry was, he lit up. He loves the history of the diocese. The success of the diocese goes back to one missionary who established more than 400 churches and more than 100 schools in less than 15 years. Can you imagine even doing that in a lifetime? Because of this man, Christians are educated and Christians are strong in the diocese. Rev. Joseph told me such amazing stories at missions and evangelism, and faith.

It is often said in the US that a pastor never truly retires. They officially retire but they can never actually leave the ministry. While Rev. Joseph is no longer the pastor of a church, he assists a pastor by doing all that he is asked. This can include visitation, funerals, and so much more. Isn’t it amazing how even with such difference in culture, a pastor is a pastor. They are there by the grace of God and they never stop doing God’s work.

December 30: Afternoon

The first big thing to happen today was a visit to a church in Nazareth, though not the same Nazareth I visited 2 years ago! This town was renamed when the village converted to Christianity. The church had a tall steeple, though we were told that it was supposed to be taller, but the foundation could not hold it. In side the church, there were only a few pews in the very back of the church. In front of the pews was the baptismal font. The rest of he church, all the way to the chancel, was bare. The length of the church had a red cloth to act as the aisle. On the right, women sat in pews or on the floor. On the left, men did the same. The chancel area looked like any Anglican church, but there were more lamps, candles, and Christmas lights strung up. Outside the church was a huge Christmas tree and several stars.

We went in to sit and pray, and we were invited to stay for a baptism service. The service was conducted very like an Anglican service, so we United Methodists were able to pick out parts of the service. The boy’s choir, pastors, and children to be baptized were all in white. There were hymns and a homily concerning the responsibility of the parents and godparents of the children. A baby girl and toddler boy were baptized today. As the pastor took each child, a song was sing about the Holy Spirit, and the pastor placed water on their heads three times, presumably saying the same words we use. During the service, we could pick out the creed, the baptismal vows, and the Lord’s Prayer. Isn’t it amazing the connections Christians can have all over the world through baptism!

December 30: Counseling, Clothes, and Candles

Vanakkam! (Tamil for hello)

Yesterday was quite the day. We started out with two lectures by TTS faculty. The first was on ecological issues in India. The second was on pastoral care and counseling in India. I must admit, the later lecture captured my attention and imagination. In traditional Indian family systems, all generations live together and all generations raise the children. Within the family is where most counseling took place, and it was a very directive style. The grandmother told from her experience what the grandchildren should do in a situation. Today, people move out of that type of family system, causing a loss of support and a growth in the need for counseling. Counseling is a relatively new discipline in India, and most counselors are under trained, so they counsel in the way their grandparents did instead of in the way we would learn in school. For this reason, TTS has a new and strong counseling diploma.

In the afternoon, we went in to the market in Madurai. Most of us bought outfits there. The main thing I bought was a tunic/pants/scarf outfit. I am wearing it today, and I can’t wait to show it off at home. It is so comfortable that I plan to go buy another one.

After buying clothes, we did some wandering through the market around the temple in Madurai. It reminded me of the market in Turkey, except less crowded with less pushy salespeople. That is not to say that the sales people weren’t pushy, though! It was nice to walk with men, because usually the salespeople approached the male. A little girl who was about six and a baby approached the women on the group to ask for money. We were warned not to give to beggars because people will actually mutilate babies to get pity from Westerners. To give is to support the baby mutilation industry. It was still hard to say no.

In the evening, we went to an Interreligious Christmas service. We heard some speeches about the meaning of Christmas to Muslims, Christians, and Hindus. There were presentations, and then celebrations. As our part of the celebration, we stood and sang Silent Night, Joy to the World, and Oh Holy Night, while Nick played on the guitar. Some Indians even started to clap to Joy to the World. After the presentations, we went outside for fireworks. Then we were all handed small birthday cake candles. We passed the light around and sang “We Shall Overcome” in English and in Tamil. They do that every Friday, but they did it Thursday this week for the Christmas celebration. The candles were all collected for the Friday service on peace, but we still have one among our group. A woman went to get one and handed it to Laura saying that it is a candle of peace for us to take back. Laura was quite touched.

It was quite the long day, and we woke very early this morning to head to Thomas’s village for the day. Tune in tomorrow to hear about it!

December 29: Eat and draw with your fingers

Last night at dinner, Thomas, our guide, taught us how to eat. Even though the food is often wet, rice, sauces, and breads, Indian people eat with their fingers, not silverware. So a few of us decided, when in India, eat as the Indians do! I have to say, it is rather strange to eat with your fingers when you spend so many years as a child learning to NOT eat with your fingers. In this part of India, the proper way to eat is to scoop with your four fingers and push the food in with your thumb. You are a neat eater if your palm stays clean. In other parts of India, they will pick up food with the palm.

After 2 meals eaten by hand, I am getting over my hesitancy, though we still have several people who cannot eat without their silverware.

Food is not the only place where Indians use their fingers. Some Indian women welcomed us with patterns drawn on the ground with colored ground rock. This dyed powder is dropped through their fingers on the ground in intricate colorful patterns. We were able to watch as 3 women made us this blessing (it is a blessing) in front of the door of our building. The pattern she drew for us had at least ten colors, a cross, flowers, candles, and Indian lamps. It was absolutely beautiful and mesmerizing to watch her create.

Isn’t it amazing what Indians can do with their fingers!

Today, we will go shopping and leave the comfort of the seminary. We will also go to an interreligious Christmas celebration.

December 28: LOOOONG Day

I will be posting my journal that I wrote each day in India. Since I did not have reliable internet access over there, this is the best way I can blog for you all. We went to India as a cross-cultural excursion to learn about the culture, not on a mission trip. Cross-cultural is a required course at Methodist Theological School in Ohio and a great learning experience for us! I hope you enjoy!
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I write this from my bed in the guest house at the Talmilnadu Theological Seminary in Madurai, India. It is a balmy 24 degrees Celsius (according to the last pilot we had). And it has been a looong day.

We left Columbus at noon on December 26 and arrived at Madurai at 11 AM December 28, about 36 hours later. After 4 bad flights, we finally made it. Between some very scary turbulence, a cramped plane for one of the long flights, and an unplanned landing for 3 hours to wait for visibility, we were very glad to be done with planes.

I still can’t believe we are actually in India, though the food is fairly convincing. They dulled down the spices for us, but so far the food has been very good. Our first meal here we had a lentil/rice patty with a yellow curry, toast (for the American in us), and fried egg. It helps you try new things, though, when you have only had airplane food, and that irregularly, for the last two days!

When we got off the last plane and into our vans to head to the seminary, we saw our first impressions of India. As we rode, I was stunned by how much it looks like a smaller version of Slumdog Millionaire. From shanty towns, to little street venders, the buildings look run down in our eyes. The best buildings, the ones made of stone, are worse than I can imagine living in. As we drove past the buildings, Dr. Van Meter explained that people set up wherever they can to protect their families.

The roads were teaming with people walking and on motorcycles. There were very few vehicles bigger than a rickshaw. A motorcycle could have as many as five people on it: a man, wife, and 3 kids under 7 in one case. Most people were dressed traditionally, except for some men.

We as westerners draw a lot of attention. Because our plane stopped for three hours, we only spent a couple minutes at the wedding reception. People kept taking our pictures. People wanted to shake our hands. When we greeted the new couple, we had our picture taken with them, just as everybody else did. It was when we stood in line to greet them that our pictures were taken in a way that was unusual.

For the wedding, the colors seemed to be primarily red and gold. The couple and several others were wearing this, though the bride was the most ornate. Behind the couple was a red and gold couch, though I am not sure what it was for. It was a Christian wedding.

Well, I’m exhausted, so I’ll catch you up again soon!